Economical Beer Review: Old Milwaukee
October 25, 2008 by Matthew Mcgarnickle
We’re back for the second edition of the Economical Beer Review. Where it’s our goal to help you make the right beer choice for you wallet, your taste buds and your self-respect.
This week The Daily Seagull is reviewing Old Milwaukee. Enjoy!
Beer: Old Milwaukee (pronounced Mill-eee-wok-eh). Also known as ‘Old Milly.’
Price (6-pack before taxes): $8.55, or $1.42 per beer.
Slogan: There’s no slogan on the can, but the website says, “America’s Best Tasting Beer.” I wonder if they have any evidence to prove this? The Daily Seagull also did some investigation to see if Old Milwaukee had any other slogans. And apparently they do:
“It doesn’t get any better than this” – it sure doesn’t!
“Old Milwaukee beer, tastes as great as its name” – I sure do love the taste of Old Milaukee’s name!
Quality: A case of Old Milwaukee is like one of those mingler packs: every beer tastes different. Overall it has a nice light taste that becomes delicious after your 10th or 11th.
Social Acceptability: The can has a picture of a scantily clad woman on it, which is by definition, socially acceptable. So if you’re drinking Old Milwaukee at a party and some dude says, “Hey everybody, that guy’s drinking Old Milwaukee. I used to drink that, but then my Dad got a job!” Just remind him that there is a picture of a scantily clad woman on the can, and ask him if he has a problem with that.
Unique Factor: Old Milwaukee is celebrating their 71st anniversary by releasing limited edition cans with women on them. Let me repeat that, Old Milwaukee is celebrating their 71st anniversary with women on their cans. I would love to meet the marketing genius behind this. Something tells me they needed an excuse to put the women on the can, so they decided to celebrate the big seven-one!
Final Score: 3 beers out of a 6 pack. The inconsistent taste definitely lowered the score. But cheers to 71 years!
Come back next Saturday for another Economical Beer Review. Any requests?
All hail to Milleeewokeeh…..I’m not worthy to such a great taste in beer…..and you got’a love the price!
I was the marketing genius behind the women on the can campaign our slogan was gonna be “bitches and beer” but for some reason the women were offended by that? I’m glad you enjoy our 71 years of goodness. Next week how about Pabst.
Although Old Milly has a hint of cigarette, and a texture similar to that of a MLB players loogey, I still feel it deserves at least 4-5 out of 6. The scantily clad female on the can coupled with the feel of brotherhood make up for its below average taste. How about Bowen Island lager, Dude, or Islander.
I think its time u review TNT or cantibury beer
If you don’t review Bowen soon I’m gonna do it for you!
Patience Mr Latterson, all good things come to those who wait… and you are waiting, so good things will come to you, or will they? They will.
Last time I waited a week for you to tell me what six pack to celebrate the weekend with and you gave me Old MallyWanker, so no, in this case I have to watch P. Latt get krunk on your favorite barfjuice while I remain uninformed and sober. I bet you’d probably drink Mr. Clean if they put a full body shot of him on the bottle. Why don’t you just make that your next ‘economical review’! I’ll get you Mcgarnickle!
Who the hell is Pee Latterson? I’m Pee Latterson! Quit trying to rob my identity, you teeeving shhtable boy! P Latt doesn’t get krunk, he blacks out long before the possibility of getting krunk. And lord knows I don’t like barfjuice or Bowen Island … I grab which ever beer is in Kevin Brockman’s fridge ….
Old milwaukee has been celebrating the 71st anniversary for four years now in canada, its 2009 maybe a 75th celebration with mnore chicks are on the way for this year! old mil fucking rules!
Tastes like someone puked beer into an ashtray.