Hockey Canada has Gas
November 6, 2008 by Joe Nathan
Team Canada will not be wearing their familiar Maple Leaf and Hockey player logo for the 2010 Winter Olympics in Vancouver.
International Olympic Committee rules prohibit national sports federations from displaying their logo on jerseys for marketing reasons.
The Daily Seagull contacted IOC President Jacque Rogue to comment on the situation.
“Tradition, fair-play, nationalism and teamwork,” said Rogue, “are not what the Olympics represent. The games are about money, sponsorship, intimidation, drug scandals, 8-year old Chinese gymnasts and forcing pizza parlors to change their names or our go out of business.”
Steve Yzerman, Executive Director of Canada’s National Mens Olympic Hockey Team, was quick to discover a solution.
“The IOC will not let Hockey Canada use its logo for the 2010 games; however, the IOC does allow, and persuades, teams to use the logos of official Olympic Sponsors,” said Yzerman.
“There were many options to choose from: Coca-Cola, Rona, Bell, HBC and McDonalds. After a lot of thinking, we chose Petro Canada’s logo as it is the most similar to the original Hockey Canada logo.”
Tom McKenzie, President of Petro Canada, was excited about the news.
“This will have the biggest impact, and create the largest revenues for Petro Canada since yesterday, when we raised the price of gas again for no apparent reason,” said McKenzie.
The player numbers will be modeled after the gas station prices. For example, Jarome Iginla will were 0.12, Sidney Crosby will wear 0.87 and Jonathan Toews will wear 1.19. Also, during the game the players’ jersey numbers will fluctuate for no logical reason which will inevitably frustrate fans.
“I think it’s great,” said a smiling Iginla. “It’s just like when you were a kid. You stopped at the gas station, filled up the car, and went to hockey practice.”
“I hope the numbers are interchangeable, just like at gas stations,” said a humorless Toews.
The new jerseys will be unveiled next weekend at the Toronto Maple Leafs home game. The price of the jerseys will range from $100 to $3000, depending on the global marketplace.
Hey great article, perfect tongue and cheek for this topic, because after all the IOC is doing some grandstanding for their piece of the action.
Walt AKA All Sports on the Web
All Sports on the Web