Man Gets Carried Away On NHL Trade Deadline Day: Trades Away Dog, Son
March 4, 2009 by Matthew Mcgarnickle
The NHL Trade Deadline Day is considered the ‘Christmas Eve’ of the NHL. Fans across Canada get swept up in the excitement of the prospect of their team acquiring a new player or getting rid of an old one. Unfortunately for one man, the excitement went a little bit overboard.
Bill Sampson, a data analyst from Kelowna, has been accused of trading away his dog and son to one of his colleagues for a second round draft pick and future considerations.
“He didn’t just cross the line by trading his dog and son,” said Harry, one of Bill’s colleagues at the Data Factory. “He literally put on a brand new pair of Air Jordans, took a full blown sprint towards the line and then jumped over it.”
Apparently, the bizarre trade occurred while Sampson was watching TSN’s NHL trade coverage online at work. One colleague noticed how enthusiastic Sampson was about the day, and jokingly said, “Hey Billy Boy, what’ll it take for you to trade me your dog and son.”
Sampson, who was caught up in the excitement, surprisingly responded with his trade demands for his dog and son (a second round draft pick and future considerations). The colleague who offered the proposal was so shocked to hear Sampson’s response, that he accepted the trade.
“I just pulled off the biggest trade since the Canucks and Luongo,” said Earl Gussington, the new owner of Sampson’s son and dog.
“Billy’s son and dog will make an excellent addition to my family. The dog has a lot of experience with cuddling which should contribute to our family’s immediate goals. The boy is still young, but I think that in a few years he will become an excellent son and contributor to the family.”
Bill Sampson’s wife, Julia, doesn’t share the same enthusiasm.
“I’m upset that he traded away our dog and son,” said his wife, Julia Sampson. “But I’m even more upset that he only got a second round draft pick and future considerations in return. I would have thought they were at least worth a first round draft pick and a prospect, and maybe a cat.”
The investigation into the ethics of the trade will continue until next week when the authorities will decide whether to press charges. On a positive note, the Toronto Maple Leafs have already contacted Sampson and offered him a job in the front office.
Hey McGarnagl, as usual this is old news. I’ve been trading away my sons and pets at the deadline since you were at your momma’s teet. in 2003 I almost landed a deal that saw my wife and daughter go to the bruins in exchange for Jiri Dopita and a couple of lower-bowl tickets to the next home game. The deal was dissapproved by head office because supposedly I was trying to deal “damaged goods”. New NHL my……hey hey kids! I’ll git choo Count Betttmann!
At least he didn’t trade away Julia! btw…I’m glad I wasn’t traded. I would hate to take the twins (Fritz and Garfield) out of school.