Martin Havlat Tears Groin
September 23, 2008 by Kevin Brockman
Oft injured Chicago Blackhawks right wing Martin Havlat appears to be set to start the season on the sidelines again after tearing both groin muscles while applying suntan lotion at his Florida home on Saturday. Known for his propensity to get injured on the ice, this year he may be known for getting injured off of it.
“It’s frustrating as hell,” a distraught Havlat told reports from his hospital bed, the same bed he has spent over 4000 hours since the 2002/2003 NHL seasons. “I trained really hard in the off-season so I would be ready to play this year and help out the Blackhawks. I didn’t know suntan lotion could be so slippery.” According to Havlat, the injury occurred whilst he vigorously was coating his legs with suntan lotion while lying by the pool at his residence in Florida. “I don’t know what happened, one minute I was applying lotion to my thighs and the next my hand had slipped to my toes and I heard two popping sounds. My groin just isn’t made for stretches of that magnitude.”
At this point, it appears that Havlat will once again play only 20 games this season. A follow-up call to confirm Havlat’s status for the year resulted in a torn rotator cuff when he reached for the phone a bit too eagerly. Havlat is scheduled to earn $6 million dollars this season.
The man is made of glass. Look for another 20 game season. Ottawa did well to cut him loose.