Vancouver Renames Downtown Eastside to “West Calgary”
February 20, 2009 by Matthew Mcgarnickle
The City of Vancouver has come up with a creative way of dealing with the homeless and drug addiction problem in the Downtown Eastside: They’re going to give the problem to Calgary.
Vancouver City Council today voted in favor of officially renaming the troubled Downtown Eastside to “West Calgary.” Therefore, instead of actually having to deal with the issues they created in the area, they’re passing it off to Calgary.
“The City of Vancouver has finally fixed the Downtown Eastside,” said David Roberts, City Counselor. “It’s perfect timing too because it’s just before the Olympics. Now when visitors come to our city and they complain about the Downtown Eastside we can just say, ‘It’s not our problem, it’s Calgary’s.’”
The city will be strategically installing signage in the most run-down areas that say “Welcome To West Calgary: We Have A Problem”. The signs should serve to remind residents and visitors to the area that Calgary is really at fault for all the problems in the Eastside.
Vikki Brown, a resident of Yaletown, is very concerned about Calgary’s abilities to solve the Downtown Eastside problems. “Calgary really has to step up to the plate here and fix their drug problems in West Calgary. They should be ashamed of themselves for letting the problem escalate over the years. Shame on you Calgary, shame on you.”
The Daily Seagull contacted Calgary City Hall to inquire about any plans to improve West Calgary. Nobody would speak on record but an anonymous city counselor apologized for the problem and said their staff was working on creative ideas to fix the area while still maintaining the cultural and social structure.
When we passed on these comments to City Counselor Roberts he responded, “Suckers!”
Vancouver’s ‘name-change’ strategy has been so successful that the City of Surrey is now considering renaming the troubled Whalley area to ‘North White Rock.’
I welcome a portal to the west coast. If Vancouver doesn’t want a vital part of their history and culture, we in Cow Town certainly do. It will make those Canuck games even easier for me to cheer on our Flames.
Let me get this straight….you spend your money and time boozing it up at expensive hockey games, while you’re fellow Calgarians shoot up right next to the stadium?? Shame on you! Do the right thing…hop on that cow and saunter your ass down to a soup kitchen…
You need directions?…I’ll be at the game ; ) (”sucka”)…
Wow, L McDonald has kind of missed the point of the article. The Downtown Eastside will only be your “portal to the west coast” if you don’t mind stumbling all over crackwhores, used syringes, drug dealers, passed out drunks, and dead bodies on your way over.
Enjoy, I guess.
how childish of Vancouver…
shame on you guys!
Anyways, how come nobody is blaming the homeless? Im more angry at the crack head who wouldn’t think twice about jumping for my money.
Is this a joke or what?….how can the city of Vancouver pass over responsibility for one of its central neighbourhoods to another city. This has to be a joke otherwise it’s worse than childish , it’s deeply disturbing. Can a big city like Vancouver really not deal with a so called ‘problem’ neighbourhood? …or indeed have any compassion towards a poor group of its ‘own’ citizens.
If the city wants to deal with the problem head on and really try and revitalise it properly they could do worse than look at how local authorities in British cities are doing in addressing similar problems rather than looking at US cities. Cities like Liverpool, Glasgow and Newcastle upon Tyne would NEVER abandon a section of their own citizens to another city. Pathetic c’mon Vancouver you’ve got to do better than this!